We love it when couples write their own, personal wedding vows and believe this is often the best part of the ceremony. For many of us, this is what getting married is all about: promises and declarations of love.
However, the first rule is: they can also be fun!
We suggest each person writes their vows separately and prepares them to read them as a surprise on the day. The vows need only to be a few sentences long, especially when we are talking about elopements.
We have devised a 3-step process to make writing your vows as simple as possible, whilst also bringing a happy tear to the eye, not to mention a few giggle moments!
1. COME TO AN AGREEMENT (Good practice for any marriage.)
Will your vows be humorous, poetic OR romantic?
Are you going to surprise each other on the day?
Will the wording be different OR will you make the same promises to each other, as you would with traditional vows?
2. START WRITING (Just Do It!)
With your first draft, just get some words down but don’t worry about it being perfect. Perhaps give yourself a 5 minute deadline, then leave it for a few hours. Starting can sometimes be the hardest part.
Start by completing one or two of the sentence starters below. Choose the ones which seem easy to you. Either do this together or separately but get creative. Think about how you felt when you first met and why your you first fell in love.
I first realised that I loved you.. (when? why?)
I knew I wanted to marry you when.. (explain)
I love you because.. (perhaps include the small quirky things)
I most admire you because.. (detail)
You inspire me.. (in what way?)
Since we met.. (how your life has improved)
You could continue or end your vows in any one of the following ways:
With you by my side..
Thank you for…
I promise to.. (outline serious or playful promises)
To me, marriage with you (insert name) means..
3. PULL OUT THE BEST BITS (You've done the hardest part already!)
Take your trusty highlighter and pick out the most important sentences. The ones that move you in the right way, make you laugh or are the hardest ones to say out loud. (In a good way.)
Finally, here are our tips for reading your wedding vows:
Read slower than you think.
You are saying these important words TO your partner, so try to look into their eyes and really mean it.
Watch some movies, listen to some songs, go on a date, do anything you need to do to get those creative juices flowing.
Writing vows can be a challenge for some, but hey, making coffee can be a challenge for some too.
That’s why we have places like Dunkin’ where they can make the coffee for you, so if you are finding it all too hard, let us know and we will make your vows for you too!